So I was doing English homework which related to philosophy (to be more exact, authenticity) and came across this.
I think its interesting. And if we were all to take advice from that article, we'd all be more interesting, attractive people. Wouldn't that be nice?
And yes. I was doing English homework D:
03 November 2009
Authenticity
So I was doing English homework which related to philosophy (to be more exact, authenticity) and came across this.
I think its interesting. And if we were all to take advice from that article, we'd all be more interesting, attractive people. Wouldn't that be nice?
And yes. I was doing English homework D:
I think its interesting. And if we were all to take advice from that article, we'd all be more interesting, attractive people. Wouldn't that be nice?
And yes. I was doing English homework D:
13 comments:
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Ooh! Existentialism. I've been trying to wrap my little mind around that big concept for like... 6 weeks. I borrowed a book called "Existentialism for Dummies" and I tried to read it but ended up reading staring at the cakes in "Cake Chic" instead. Anyway, the book is like half read, I keep abandoning it for Stephen King. Did you ever end up reading that short story I sent you by Clive Barker? Have you read Clive Barker's stuff? I wish I didn't have to go to school. I find it sorta... pointless. Like Neil Gaiman said:
“I've been making a list of the things they don't teach you at school. They don't teach you how to love somebody. They don't teach you how to be famous. They don't teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don't teach you how to walk away from someone you don't love any longer. They don't teach you how to know what's going on in someone else's mind. They don't teach you what to say to someone who's dying. They don't teach you anything worth knowing.”
Seriously. How important is all this stuff that we're 'learning' ever going to be. Were you the one I was discussing whether life smart was better than intellectual smart?
Like I get existentialism, but at the same time I don't. Like that story of the guy punished by the gods and told to push the boulder up the hill and then have it roll down again but instead of feeling like it's a stupid task, he actually enjoys? it? But the thing is, sometimes I feel like everything is pointless, because we're all going to die anyway. Living authentically is easier said than done (ooh, I noticed something about authenticity in your study planner?) Okay, so there's no reason to things that happen, it's not that bad things happen to good people, there are no good/bad things/people. Things just happen. I guess that's why people turn to religion,they believe in some higher power, that things happen for a reason, and that's comforting. Something awful happens and you can say "oh, that happened for a reason, because He has a bigger plan for me" but if there is no He, then there's no plan and we have to dictate the course of our own lives and the whole do I believe in fate? thing comes up. Like is the course of our life determined when we're born, should I believe in horoscopes, why am I here and all those other unanswered questions. I'm not knocking religion. I wish I believed. And I guess that's what faith is, to believe without absolute proof. I guess I don't have faith then.
Anyway, have you heard of Keats' theory of 'negative capability'? I think you might've enjoyed Eng Ext this year, it's a heck of a lot more interesting than last year. -
November 16, 2009 at 8:59 PM
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Lee said...
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Are you looking into existentialism just for English or for “personal growth” or interest or …? oh Goody you can bake me something that looks good x). I hate it when I really want to read a book and manage to get halfway and then get distracted but still want to read it. I’ve still only read a third of the Brothers Karamazov …which is now 9 weeks overdue. Yeah the midnight meat train! Yes finished! But never finished de Sade’s book because it got too...dull (although that’s probably the wrong word). Ahaha I’ve come to the conclusion that the main thing that school teaches you is have a high shit-tolerance level (put up with the bitch side of life).
Yummo. I really need to read Stardust…but still reading Herzog. Sigh. Let’s argue about love someday. Everyone has a firm stance on that ^^. Although I don’t think you like getting v. opinionated? Yeah I think it was me. What conclusion did we arrive at? I think it was life smart. You know another way of looking at things: if we didn’t go to school we wouldn’t be able to meet certain people who are textbooksmart but “lifedumb”. (gosh that sounds awkward). And from them we can draw experience or go “ugh I don’t want to end up like that”
Maybe instead of looking at the whole of life being pointless you could start seeing certain negatives as pointless. (Like stressing, revenge etc.) and you know, what you said earlier about “being the best darn Vicki I can be”. I was reading this philosophy forum (>.<) and they were saying how the most important things were taking care of your health and personal growth (btw. Check out steve pavlina? Although some of its … I mean his wife/exwife is a psychic) We can all try to be authentic though. I’d love to see that. Yeah moleskine just has random notes on authenticity that I was taking. In response to “things just happen”: you don’t lean towards the Sartre point of view? (you know, where man is free but must take responsibility for everything and so are um… ‘shackled’ by freedom?) So at the same time, I suppose you can see religion as a way of escaping the responsibility part of things. OH yeah did you say something about how religion was to keep the poor in their place, to prevent revolutions because at least their masters would burn in hell (or did I read this somewhere…)? Damn I wish G. Coombs had started that philosophy club at school -.- But faith and religion, I see as two very different things.
Is that the one about being able to admit that you can’t do it or solve a problem or something? Aren’t you doing romanticism which is all the mushy stuff about nature (not that I don’t love trees eheh)? Damn can we start our own philosophy club?
btw... your response was a page long in word. -
November 17, 2009 at 5:38 PM
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Lee said...
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just stumbled across this: http://www.catholiceducation.org/articles/civilization/cc0013.html I think its interesting to read criticism of this sort.
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November 17, 2009 at 5:56 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Oh, for personal growth. We don't do much philosophy or anything in English, Robert mainly talks about techniques until it's bleeding out of our ears. Not sure if I like him knowing my name, because now he says it since there are only like 6 people in my class. But he knew my face before, and he'd refer to me as 'Miss' so I guess 'Vicki' is better than 'Miss'. Urgh, still don't know what to put on the back of my jersey. Whatcha gonna put on the back of yours? Oh yeah, like they say “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. So yeah, if you survive high school, you can probably survive any shit that life throws your way.
Anyway, the cakes LOOK good, but they're... not so tasty. Sigh. I find pretty cakes don’t taste so great. Mmm, is that some sort of metaphor? Pretty people aren’t that nice or something. I think my mum and I were discussing beautiful people in relation to one of my uncle’s wife. My mum was like “She’s really silly and vapid and has no common sense” and I was like “Is she beautiful?” because if she’s not, then she has no redeeming qualities. I mean, you have to find someone who’s pretty on the inside, because outer beauty fades. And if you’re ugly on the inside but pretty on the outside, once you’re outer beauty fades, you’re ugly on both the inside and outside, and your worth as a human being is sorta moot. Do you reckon beautiful people have a better life? It’s weird, I have this theory that the world is fair. I mean, there isn’t anyone in the world who is absolutely breathtakingly beautiful that you can’t stop staring at, who has a fabulous life and has everything one could wish for. Because then you’d just hate that person. Which reminds me of Marilyn Manson’s ‘The Beautiful People’. There are people who are more physically attractive than average, but then they don’t get everything either. It makes things fair.
I want to make pavlova and use edible flowers from my garden as garnish. :)
Oh that! Is Brothers Karamazov boring or something? (it sorta does look boring) Is that why it's taking so long to read, or is a really dense and profound book that you have to keep stop to think about it and all? Because profound books are great and all, but I guess sometimes, well, most of the time, I don’t want profound. I just want something to immerse myself in. de Sade's book did sorta get dull. I mean, people described it as a 'shopping list' of depravities, and it pretty much is. Torture, rape, sodomy, kinky shit all gets sorta boring after awhile. Y'know, I didn't realize sadism came from de Sade until Vicki 1 pointed it out.
Stardust is lovely. Have you seen the movie? It was actually a pretty good movie. One of the few that does justice to the book it's based on.
Love is stupid. Sucks how we all desperately need it and search high and low for it. Oh, the whole “getting v. opinionated” sometimes is confusing, because you remember the thing I said to you “sometimes I’m not sure if my opinions are mine, or I’m just being a mirror to those around me” yeah. Hmm, I like that term “lifedumb”. Ooh, not sure how this is relevant, but did you hear about how Belle Du Jour’s real personality was revealed? She was studying for her PhD and became a call girl to pay for tuition. She got paid like 300 pounds an hour. Sounds like an interesting job. But I dunno, what happens if you find your client completely unattractive/repulsive? -
November 22, 2009 at 5:23 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Aww, why are you ashamed that you were reading a philosophy column? Hmm, do you believe that it’s nature or nurture? I guess that sometimes I wonder “How do you measure a life?” I mean, you can’t measure a human life in terms of money, because at the same time as being priceless, it’s sorta worthless at the same time. Why are people unhappy when they can be happy, it’s as if people are never satisfied. We always want more and more and more, so I guess that’s what’s greasing the wheels of consumerism. I mean, using myself (and probably countless others) as an example, when it’s summer, I long for winter, and when it’s winter, I wish it were summer. It’s the whole living in the moment thing, and that’s hard to do, because you’re always either looking forward or back, and I think a lot of people are just sitting, waiting, wishing for something to change, or hoping that maybe things will be better in the future, or better elsewhere (you know, I call it ‘greener grass syndrome’) but it’s not really. I think I’ve finally realized it’s all the same. I mean, if you look into the life of someone with exorbitant amounts of money, and the life of someone with little money, there’s not much difference. I mean, the difference is superficial really.
You know what I think is really stupid? ‘things to do before I die’ lists. I mean, what happens when you cross off everything off your list? Does that mean you can die once you’ve finished the list?
Erm, I didn’t say that about religion. You must’ve read it somewhere. Yeah, I think it would’ve been good, but I think if we start our only philosophy club, there’d just be you and me. But I place dibs on being treasurer. :) Oh, but aren’t I your right handwoman in our WD plans? (We’re sorta over that yeah? I don’t really want the world. I don’t even know what I want anymore. It’s like I want everything, but it’s not enough. Material possessions aren’t enough to satisfy me anymore. I need… souls. Just kidding.) Have you got any good ideas for a club? Negative capability is more where you don’t always run towards fact or reason and try to explain everything that happens. I guess where you just embrace the flow of things. Romanticism is sorta more than just nature, it’s sorta like temporary escapism from the pain and the disappointment of life into a world of ideal beauty, but then being disappointed, because it’s just an illusion. -
November 22, 2009 at 5:23 PM
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Lee said...
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I HATE ANALYSIS. Can you tell ? Ahaha ‘miss’ makes things awkward but at least it shows… respect? Maybe? Anyway I think I asked you if you thought “hi _name_” was better than just “hi” and you said it was because of intimacy. Hmm.. would “vixen” be improper? What about “vapour drops” (you know Vick’s vapour drops and “hey I’m cool”) nah that sucks. Tell me if you think of something! I think I’m going with DUmitrescu. Composer dude. And if people ask me what it means, I’m going to tell them to go google it. That’s assuming that we get out of high school trauma-free. I mean I could have grey hair and high school as my freaking Achilles heel. You know, calm and wise and then bawl when anyone says “Hi” because it sounds like “high” and then you think “school.”
What about those pretty cupcakes you like? So if someone isn’t beautiful and is really silly and vapid and has no common sense then that’s it? There are no other virtues worthy of note? I suppose that’s a bit like the old wives tale that if you have pretty hands you have a not so pretty face and vice versa. Outer beauty is a … delicate (?) situation. I mean there’s no point having it unless you’re going to use it to your (unfair) advantage. And then when you put too much time and effort into it, you become a hole on the inside and other people see that. (like Quinn and Daria)… did that even make sense? The point is, if you’re gold on the inside, it shines through. No-one worth sparing time for cares about what you look like on the outside after the first meeting. And I don’t know if this is the case for everyone but I assume… the more you look at someone, the more beautiful they become if they’re kind and decent and blah blah whereas some people get more repulsive as you look at them and you start to notice all their flaws and the cracks and its like their rotting from the inside out.
Hmm I reckon we dramatise people’s lives so that they are more interesting than our lives. Whatever happened to “god gives with both hands”? Maybe we haven’t met enough people. But hell I’d probably bash them over the head with something heavy and metal or marry them. I’m scary like that. Someday we’ll have this convo in person and I will ask you to make up (tragic) stories about beautiful people. That would be an awesome day.
Oooh there’s this really not so great book called “garden spells” can’t remember who by but the main character uses all sorts of flowers in all sorts of foods. It sounds really interesting! When are you going to do it? Take pictures! And do like a little review hehe.
No! Dostoyevsky or Dostoevsky or however you want to spell it is great! But after reading a column, you have to stop and think. And you know when you keep putting a book down because of bloody hw and everything and you lose the chain? Yeahh. Bloody hell. One day I swear I will finish everything by Dostoyevsky and that Anna Karenina book that I got halfway through. What have you been reading recently? Ahaha have you ever watched Quills? Can I lend it to you and make you watch it? Its about the Marquis de Sade. Haha why is the other Vicki number 1? Age?
Nope. Have you used the bath bomb? Well… you mean apart from twilight? Kidding. I haven’t watched the movie so I can’t say it was crap. Yet. I needs me evidence!
I don’t think love is stupid. I think it IS necessary. I just think that idealistic romantic love that’s stuck in everyone’s heads because of asshole books and movies and bull is a waste of time and energy. So we both believe in tabula rasa then? I agree with you but I think that a more educated opinion would be one that you choose to take on after evaluating the lot? I mean otherwise are we just dead fish? 300 POUNDS!!! HOLY FUCK. Did she actually ever get a job after uni? You take Viagra? But I don’t know. Is your pride connected to it somehow? -
December 7, 2009 at 11:01 PM
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Lee said...
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Only ashamed because I was supposed to be doing homework . Nurture definitely. And that’s why I’m an asshole. But if you believe in nurture but also freedom and responsibility in the Sartre way then… what? What about people who want to be happy but can’t be happy? Suppose there are two ways to judge a life; by its impact on others and by the satisfaction gained by the person living it. But none of that is quantitative. Well if I were a smarter person, I’d move to a slum somewhere so I can appreciate life without the impact of consumerism. I hate money. Can’t live with it and can’t live without it. Bit like being married to an asshole. But perhaps they differ in the quality of life? One will die from obesity-related disease or an accident during lipo while the other will die from malnutrition. Which is more painful?
What about things to do now lists? I like lists. They give me something to do before I decide what I want to do.
Ahaah you on treasurer?! Oooh well trash that idea then. Did I ever tell you about Angelspit? No I never really wanted the world. I just wanted to wear a cape and monocle and an army costume … and yell at people. I need self-empowerment. A change of personality. And personal growth.
And sorry about the late reply . I’m such a bitch. We should use emails once again. These are too long for "comments" >.< -
December 7, 2009 at 11:02 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Aww, Shelley darling, that sucks, since analysis is like 95% of the course. I used to hate analyzing the crap out of everything, but now I find it safer. My imagination seems to have dried up. Mmm, but I’m not very vixen-y. I could try it. It’s better than a smiley face. :) Oh, hehe, yes, that’s very you isn’t it? Something cool, but obscure. Nah, I reckon you’ll forget high school altogether. I mean seriously, what do you remember from the past 5 years?
Well…I think that there are other virtues other than beauty and intelligence. Compassion, integrity, and kindness. Oh, well, I have pretty hands, so I guess my face isn’t. I don’t mind. I used to wish I was beautiful, but I don’t mind it so much anymore. Like you said, more important things, and yeah, I’d rather be beautiful on the inside. I get what you mean about Quinn and Daria, it seems you can’t be beautiful and smart. Yeah, there are people that are just empty, and just because they are beautiful, they don’t captivate because there’s nothing inside, and soon you can’t stand the stench of rotting.
Yeah, I think that’s true. I mean, everyone’s life is sorta boring. You are sorta scary. You used to scare me. It’s not that you’re not scary anymore, I just got used to it. Ooh, yes, tragic stories. :) Oh, that sounds like a really cool book, I searched it up with my google-fu. I made pavlova for my picnic tomorrow, I’ll give you some if there’s any left over. :)
Ah, deep thoughts. Sometimes I like those. Anna Karenina was good, I’ve never finished it either. I’ve been reading up on folklore and legends. It really fascinates me! Ooh, yeah, I’ll watch it! Yeah, well, its age (she’s older) plus last name ‘C’ comes before ‘L’.
No, I haven’t used many lush bath bombs. I prefer the bubble slices. Yeah, idealist romance stuck in everyone’s head because of Disney and movies and just the whole idealism. Love isn’t roses and fairytales and happily ever after. It’s about compromise, and I think that these days, everyone seems to not care about anything anymore. The only things we value are power and money, and we worship fame and money and beautiful people. It’s so stupid. The most stupid things ever are: speed dating, facebook, online dating and twitter. And possible other things that I cannot remember. But all these things do is feed narcissism. Tabula rasa always reminds me of that Buffy episode where everyone forgot everything. I think that amnesia would be fun, don’t you? I have no compunctions against being a high class call girl. Is that weird? It's just that I've read Alexa (The Real Princess Diaries) and she makes it sound... fun. She makes like $1000 an hour, which is more than most people make in a WEEK. Oh, and yeah, Belle de Jour's current employer doesn't care that she was a call girl. http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2009/nov/15/belle-de-jour-blogger-prostitute
I’m not really sure what I believe in. I think I mostly believe in nature, since it seems that people’s personalities are from when they’re kids (I mean, if you look at when you were a kid, it’s not like you’ve changed that much. I’m still quiet, introverted, and not a big fan of people). I mean, environment certainly does shape you to a degree, but I dunno. It’s not like people ever really change. I'm not suddenly going to be extroverted and outgoing. I think that happiness is a state of mind, and not a situation. You can choose to be happy. But then again, I think about the people who are born into like third world countries, do you think they're happy? It makes me so angry. I know no one ever said life was fair, but it just seems so unjust that like you said, there are people dying of starvation while others are dying because they can’t stop eating. And erm, I think malnutrition is more painful. And sllooooooooow. When I die, I want it to be fast. -
December 8, 2009 at 7:51 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Ugh, yeah, I know exactly how you feel. Money turns you off, but you need it. But erm, why do you need an asshole husband? Please don't say because he's good looking.
I feel like a rat. I guess that’s why they call it the ‘rat race’. We’re working to buy stuff that we don’t really need with money we don’t really have. I’d like to live in a rainforest and be self-sufficient. I think that’s my goal/dream. I don’t want to be stuck in the endless cycle of a nine-to-five job that I hate to make money. And I know that I say I hate materialism and consumerism, but having stuff makes me happy. :/ I feel bad for feeling that way.
Do now lists are good. I mean, lists are good, they help get things done, and make sure that I don’t forget something, but seriously, all those books on ‘Things to do before you die’ are silly. What happens if you don’t finish the list before you die? You’ll feel like you’ve missed out.
What’s Angelspit? I didn’t really want the world either. I just wanted nice dresses. You... have a thing for capes don’t you? Well, I think you’re heading in the right direction. :) I think you have to know your goals before you can achieve them. I was annoyed the other day because I didn't know what I want from life, and how will I know if I get 'it' if I don't even know what 'it' is?
Yeah, but emails get buried under all these other emails. And you/I forget to reply. Or you don’t use your email anymore. But yes, too long for comments. :P And maybe the word limit helps keep me from rambling. Erm, maybe. -
December 8, 2009 at 7:55 PM
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Lee said...
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NONONNOOO! Vicki we have to start making up wild plans again so that your creative juices come back! Analysis makes me woozy. It takes the fun out of everything. I even analyse ads now T.T Ahahaha I’d laugh every time I see the smiley face though! Its so… mysterious and rebellious. Gross I sound like a chef talking about what I just cooked. Meh but what if I don’t like Dumitrescu in five years? What if someone knows more about him than I do!! That’d suck. Well doesn’t your memory work so that you remember the crap of your recent past and the highlights of your distant past? You know, I regret not being more… active. (not physically)
Is your aunt any of those? That’s not what I meant when I made that comment about hands and faces. I meant to say that maybe the compromise was utter bullshit. Yeah I used to want to be beautiful. Now I just want to look striking or creepy. Its not working. One day I’m going to prove you wrong ^^ I’m going to find someone who’s beautiful and smart! OR you know what? We can work on that! I mean if we haven’t tried then how can we say that it doesn’t work? Suddenly I’m reminded of breakfast at tiffany’s with all this talk of rats and bores.
Ahahah how did I used to scare you??? You were the one planning to stab me in my sleep! (I think I’ve been asked that question about a billion times). You know, your rapport. Not in the way it was supposed to but it broke the ice! Well done. Otherwise I might still be dreaming up different answers to that bloody question. (ooh looksie a pun!) It sounds like but it’s not a really cool book. Don’t waste your time reading it like I did. OOoh did you finish making it then? Aww haha you’re sweet. Have fun on the picnic! Are you actually going anywhere though? What’s ms Leto (sp?) making?
Do you know what happens in the end? I told Sambavi to tell me so she did and now… I regret it. But hopefully I’ll forget so I can go back and read it. Have you ever read Homer’s anything? Yeah I love all the Greek mythology. Ohh you grew out of your horror book phase! I’ve been reading Russian short stories …yummo.
Yeah hopefully I remember to bring Quills sometime ^^ Darn does that mean we can’t have a Vicki-off? Like… to the death?
And hollywood. And even bollywood. I have a toothache. Sorry, random babble. Isn’t love basically the same as a medicine degree? Like people only want it because its highly sought after and it makes everyone else envious. Or maybe we don’t want lovers. We want slaves. Hm.. I’d pay a good stack of money not to be famous. Maybe we should get with the literature buffs. Move in nerd circles and go to book launches or something. At least that way we’d be worshiping intelligence… to some extent. I don’t actually know what speed dating is… I think I read somewhere that facebook was for stalking your friends, twitter was for stalking celebs and bebo was for stalking jailbait. I wish I had short term memory loss. Why are you asking me if that’s weird? As though I’d be in a position fit to judge. It does sound interesting. I’m not sure if what ever little pride I have would make way for it though. It’s probably one of those decisions that we should make later in life when we’ve got more to lose (i.e. more mature). -
December 8, 2009 at 10:16 PM
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Lee said...
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But family environment is pretty much set for the first 18 years of life so why nature? I mean you know how a child’s first word is often “no” because adults say it to them so often then doesn’t it mean that all other factors impact the kid as well? But if you were moved to a radically different environment then you’d be forced to change who you are. It makes you angry but what are you going to do about it?
Because I would’ve invested a great deal of time and effort into a loving relationship…even though he’s an asshole. Assholes are loveable too!
I went through this stage once where I thought…I wish we didn’t have money. I wish we just bartered stuff. You’ve given me an idea! Brace yourself! Let’s go and camp in the bush/forest/make-believe rainforest in the royal national park sometime! And we can get in touch with nature and meditate and have fun hehe. Oh and try and decide why we haven’t killed ourselves off yet (I mean, what we’re living for)
Angelspit’s a band. But the point is the main singer is amelia tan/ amelia arsenic and she’s crazy gorgeous but the amazing thing is she came out of our school. So there’s some hope yet I suppose. www.destroyx.com
You to your capes and me to my dresses! I mean swap it around! Well when and if we go on that camping trip, we’ll find out what we want from life :D
YAY I broke the 2 page mark. Ahahaha um okay no emails then :’( -
December 8, 2009 at 10:16 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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Yeah, we should. But I’m so lazy. I guess I’m still sorta creative when I bake things. :) I love baking. I used to hate analyzing, but you know how they go “If you can’t beat them, join them”? Well, I figure there’s no way to escape, so I might as well enjoy it. A smiley face is rebellious? Oh, did you know someone last year managed to put “If You Seek Amy”? (You know, the Britney song? I sang along to that for AGES before I realized) Well, in five years, it won’t matter, since you’ll never wear your jersey after this time next year. Oh, my memory glosses over anything bad that happened and only remembers the good stuff. Oh, but I remember the REALLY REALLY bad stuff. Oh, what do you mean? Like more involved with other people and stuff?
Is my aunt any of what? Oh, yeah, it is. But you are beautiful. It’s funny (or sad) how we never see all the beauty that we possess, but other people can. I guess it’s sad. We spend our whole lives wishing we were like someone else, when they probably spent their lives wishing they were someone else too.
I dunno, you were so cool and remote, and I just felt like you were above me. I used to feel that a lot, that people were above me. I finally realized that we’re all equal, and I guess the things I used to elevate and think were supremely important aren’t really. I got over my inferiority complex. Oh yeah, the whole trying to imitate you. :) The picnic was fun! I felt so naughty, sitting in the front of the school, the forbidden area! Man, my life is SO sad if that’s what makes me feel naughty. Oh, she was busy so she bought croissants from Baker’s Delight.
Oh, I don’t. Don’t spoil it! Does someone die though? Haha, do you thnk you’ll forget? No, but I’ve been meaning to. I love Greek mythology too! And also mythology and folklore and fairies! You know, like the seelie and unseelie court. It’s all so fascinating. And also urban legends! Yeah, sorta. Mmm, I love fairytales. We’re not having a Vicki-off! I like Vicki 1. She’s sweet and smart and sometimes I want to hug her to death. (ooh, I wonder if you caught the The Cure reference) -
December 9, 2009 at 8:48 PM
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marshmellow_cheeks said...
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You should get your tooth checked out. I don’t like having toothache. We don’t want lovers. We want someone to be our everything, we want someone to take care of our every need and make the big bad world better. Well, there’s no-one like that. I mean, I think we elevate people to the status of gods, or put them up on a pedestal, and then break up with them because they’re only human and they make mistakes or they’re not perfect. See, that’s what’s wrong with the way movies and books portray love, they say that it’s always perfect. Well, it’s not. Ooh, book launches. You know, there are some really good looking authors out there. Yeah, basically, myspace, twitter and facebook foster stalking, narcissism, or ADHD in some form. Gosh, people still use bebo? I dunno, because you’re the only one whose opinion I would respect on that subject. I have ideological conflicts with other people to ask them if they think that’s weird. What does pride have to do with it? Is it the social stigma attached to it? For some reason, I wouldn’t be ashamed if I was. Not that I’d go around saying that I’m a call girl, I don’t want to have to deal with people’s crap and misconceptions and naivety, but I wouldn’t be ashamed. It’s a job, and your job doesn’t define who you are. The amount of money or power you have doesn’t define who you are.
Yeah, that’s true, but Dean’s personality was evident since he was just born. I think that if you changed to a different environment, you’d slip on a different mask. It’s like Jaques’ speech in ‘As You Like It’, “All the world’s a stage…” we have our roles, and we do what we have to do to conform and belong, we wear whatever mask we need to, to fit in, but that doesn’t change who we are inside. I have no idea what my point is anymore. I want to do something about it. I think that I’d like to do a lot of philanthropy when I’m old enough. But first I have to help myself before I can help others. Yeah, I guess, he’s an asshole, but he’s your asshole. It’s sorta like… you don’t want him, but you don’t really want anyone else to have him.
Yeah, I used to wish I was completely self-sufficient, but then I did economics and I understand the reason for specialization, because it leads to a higher standard of living, and if I had to grow my own food, I wouldn’t be able to sit around and think about crap. Ooh, you should join us on Victoria’s camp! I’m sure the sitting in sermons would be relaxing! Haha, yes. Because suicide is not an option, remember, existentialists don’t advocate suicide, just because the world is absurd.
Oh cool! Well, I’m sure a lot of successful people have graduated from our school. Ooh, she’s Asian? Hmm, her mouth is open for every single photo, but she’s gorgeous. Haha, you should wear a cape sometime. -
December 9, 2009 at 8:49 PM
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Ooh! Existentialism. I've been trying to wrap my little mind around that big concept for like... 6 weeks. I borrowed a book called "Existentialism for Dummies" and I tried to read it but ended up reading staring at the cakes in "Cake Chic" instead. Anyway, the book is like half read, I keep abandoning it for Stephen King. Did you ever end up reading that short story I sent you by Clive Barker? Have you read Clive Barker's stuff? I wish I didn't have to go to school. I find it sorta... pointless. Like Neil Gaiman said:
“I've been making a list of the things they don't teach you at school. They don't teach you how to love somebody. They don't teach you how to be famous. They don't teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don't teach you how to walk away from someone you don't love any longer. They don't teach you how to know what's going on in someone else's mind. They don't teach you what to say to someone who's dying. They don't teach you anything worth knowing.”
Seriously. How important is all this stuff that we're 'learning' ever going to be. Were you the one I was discussing whether life smart was better than intellectual smart?
Like I get existentialism, but at the same time I don't. Like that story of the guy punished by the gods and told to push the boulder up the hill and then have it roll down again but instead of feeling like it's a stupid task, he actually enjoys? it? But the thing is, sometimes I feel like everything is pointless, because we're all going to die anyway. Living authentically is easier said than done (ooh, I noticed something about authenticity in your study planner?) Okay, so there's no reason to things that happen, it's not that bad things happen to good people, there are no good/bad things/people. Things just happen. I guess that's why people turn to religion,they believe in some higher power, that things happen for a reason, and that's comforting. Something awful happens and you can say "oh, that happened for a reason, because He has a bigger plan for me" but if there is no He, then there's no plan and we have to dictate the course of our own lives and the whole do I believe in fate? thing comes up. Like is the course of our life determined when we're born, should I believe in horoscopes, why am I here and all those other unanswered questions. I'm not knocking religion. I wish I believed. And I guess that's what faith is, to believe without absolute proof. I guess I don't have faith then.
Anyway, have you heard of Keats' theory of 'negative capability'? I think you might've enjoyed Eng Ext this year, it's a heck of a lot more interesting than last year.
Are you looking into existentialism just for English or for “personal growth” or interest or …? oh Goody you can bake me something that looks good x). I hate it when I really want to read a book and manage to get halfway and then get distracted but still want to read it. I’ve still only read a third of the Brothers Karamazov …which is now 9 weeks overdue. Yeah the midnight meat train! Yes finished! But never finished de Sade’s book because it got too...dull (although that’s probably the wrong word). Ahaha I’ve come to the conclusion that the main thing that school teaches you is have a high shit-tolerance level (put up with the bitch side of life).
Yummo. I really need to read Stardust…but still reading Herzog. Sigh. Let’s argue about love someday. Everyone has a firm stance on that ^^. Although I don’t think you like getting v. opinionated? Yeah I think it was me. What conclusion did we arrive at? I think it was life smart. You know another way of looking at things: if we didn’t go to school we wouldn’t be able to meet certain people who are textbooksmart but “lifedumb”. (gosh that sounds awkward). And from them we can draw experience or go “ugh I don’t want to end up like that”
Maybe instead of looking at the whole of life being pointless you could start seeing certain negatives as pointless. (Like stressing, revenge etc.) and you know, what you said earlier about “being the best darn Vicki I can be”. I was reading this philosophy forum (>.<) and they were saying how the most important things were taking care of your health and personal growth (btw. Check out steve pavlina? Although some of its … I mean his wife/exwife is a psychic) We can all try to be authentic though. I’d love to see that. Yeah moleskine just has random notes on authenticity that I was taking. In response to “things just happen”: you don’t lean towards the Sartre point of view? (you know, where man is free but must take responsibility for everything and so are um… ‘shackled’ by freedom?) So at the same time, I suppose you can see religion as a way of escaping the responsibility part of things. OH yeah did you say something about how religion was to keep the poor in their place, to prevent revolutions because at least their masters would burn in hell (or did I read this somewhere…)? Damn I wish G. Coombs had started that philosophy club at school -.- But faith and religion, I see as two very different things.
Is that the one about being able to admit that you can’t do it or solve a problem or something? Aren’t you doing romanticism which is all the mushy stuff about nature (not that I don’t love trees eheh)? Damn can we start our own philosophy club?
btw... your response was a page long in word.
just stumbled across this: http://www.catholiceducation.org/articles/civilization/cc0013.html I think its interesting to read criticism of this sort.
Oh, for personal growth. We don't do much philosophy or anything in English, Robert mainly talks about techniques until it's bleeding out of our ears. Not sure if I like him knowing my name, because now he says it since there are only like 6 people in my class. But he knew my face before, and he'd refer to me as 'Miss' so I guess 'Vicki' is better than 'Miss'. Urgh, still don't know what to put on the back of my jersey. Whatcha gonna put on the back of yours? Oh yeah, like they say “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. So yeah, if you survive high school, you can probably survive any shit that life throws your way.
Anyway, the cakes LOOK good, but they're... not so tasty. Sigh. I find pretty cakes don’t taste so great. Mmm, is that some sort of metaphor? Pretty people aren’t that nice or something. I think my mum and I were discussing beautiful people in relation to one of my uncle’s wife. My mum was like “She’s really silly and vapid and has no common sense” and I was like “Is she beautiful?” because if she’s not, then she has no redeeming qualities. I mean, you have to find someone who’s pretty on the inside, because outer beauty fades. And if you’re ugly on the inside but pretty on the outside, once you’re outer beauty fades, you’re ugly on both the inside and outside, and your worth as a human being is sorta moot. Do you reckon beautiful people have a better life? It’s weird, I have this theory that the world is fair. I mean, there isn’t anyone in the world who is absolutely breathtakingly beautiful that you can’t stop staring at, who has a fabulous life and has everything one could wish for. Because then you’d just hate that person. Which reminds me of Marilyn Manson’s ‘The Beautiful People’. There are people who are more physically attractive than average, but then they don’t get everything either. It makes things fair.
I want to make pavlova and use edible flowers from my garden as garnish. :)
Oh that! Is Brothers Karamazov boring or something? (it sorta does look boring) Is that why it's taking so long to read, or is a really dense and profound book that you have to keep stop to think about it and all? Because profound books are great and all, but I guess sometimes, well, most of the time, I don’t want profound. I just want something to immerse myself in. de Sade's book did sorta get dull. I mean, people described it as a 'shopping list' of depravities, and it pretty much is. Torture, rape, sodomy, kinky shit all gets sorta boring after awhile. Y'know, I didn't realize sadism came from de Sade until Vicki 1 pointed it out.
Stardust is lovely. Have you seen the movie? It was actually a pretty good movie. One of the few that does justice to the book it's based on.
Love is stupid. Sucks how we all desperately need it and search high and low for it. Oh, the whole “getting v. opinionated” sometimes is confusing, because you remember the thing I said to you “sometimes I’m not sure if my opinions are mine, or I’m just being a mirror to those around me” yeah. Hmm, I like that term “lifedumb”. Ooh, not sure how this is relevant, but did you hear about how Belle Du Jour’s real personality was revealed? She was studying for her PhD and became a call girl to pay for tuition. She got paid like 300 pounds an hour. Sounds like an interesting job. But I dunno, what happens if you find your client completely unattractive/repulsive?
Aww, why are you ashamed that you were reading a philosophy column? Hmm, do you believe that it’s nature or nurture? I guess that sometimes I wonder “How do you measure a life?” I mean, you can’t measure a human life in terms of money, because at the same time as being priceless, it’s sorta worthless at the same time. Why are people unhappy when they can be happy, it’s as if people are never satisfied. We always want more and more and more, so I guess that’s what’s greasing the wheels of consumerism. I mean, using myself (and probably countless others) as an example, when it’s summer, I long for winter, and when it’s winter, I wish it were summer. It’s the whole living in the moment thing, and that’s hard to do, because you’re always either looking forward or back, and I think a lot of people are just sitting, waiting, wishing for something to change, or hoping that maybe things will be better in the future, or better elsewhere (you know, I call it ‘greener grass syndrome’) but it’s not really. I think I’ve finally realized it’s all the same. I mean, if you look into the life of someone with exorbitant amounts of money, and the life of someone with little money, there’s not much difference. I mean, the difference is superficial really.
You know what I think is really stupid? ‘things to do before I die’ lists. I mean, what happens when you cross off everything off your list? Does that mean you can die once you’ve finished the list?
Erm, I didn’t say that about religion. You must’ve read it somewhere. Yeah, I think it would’ve been good, but I think if we start our only philosophy club, there’d just be you and me. But I place dibs on being treasurer. :) Oh, but aren’t I your right handwoman in our WD plans? (We’re sorta over that yeah? I don’t really want the world. I don’t even know what I want anymore. It’s like I want everything, but it’s not enough. Material possessions aren’t enough to satisfy me anymore. I need… souls. Just kidding.) Have you got any good ideas for a club? Negative capability is more where you don’t always run towards fact or reason and try to explain everything that happens. I guess where you just embrace the flow of things. Romanticism is sorta more than just nature, it’s sorta like temporary escapism from the pain and the disappointment of life into a world of ideal beauty, but then being disappointed, because it’s just an illusion.
I HATE ANALYSIS. Can you tell ? Ahaha ‘miss’ makes things awkward but at least it shows… respect? Maybe? Anyway I think I asked you if you thought “hi _name_” was better than just “hi” and you said it was because of intimacy. Hmm.. would “vixen” be improper? What about “vapour drops” (you know Vick’s vapour drops and “hey I’m cool”) nah that sucks. Tell me if you think of something! I think I’m going with DUmitrescu. Composer dude. And if people ask me what it means, I’m going to tell them to go google it. That’s assuming that we get out of high school trauma-free. I mean I could have grey hair and high school as my freaking Achilles heel. You know, calm and wise and then bawl when anyone says “Hi” because it sounds like “high” and then you think “school.”
What about those pretty cupcakes you like? So if someone isn’t beautiful and is really silly and vapid and has no common sense then that’s it? There are no other virtues worthy of note? I suppose that’s a bit like the old wives tale that if you have pretty hands you have a not so pretty face and vice versa. Outer beauty is a … delicate (?) situation. I mean there’s no point having it unless you’re going to use it to your (unfair) advantage. And then when you put too much time and effort into it, you become a hole on the inside and other people see that. (like Quinn and Daria)… did that even make sense? The point is, if you’re gold on the inside, it shines through. No-one worth sparing time for cares about what you look like on the outside after the first meeting. And I don’t know if this is the case for everyone but I assume… the more you look at someone, the more beautiful they become if they’re kind and decent and blah blah whereas some people get more repulsive as you look at them and you start to notice all their flaws and the cracks and its like their rotting from the inside out.
Hmm I reckon we dramatise people’s lives so that they are more interesting than our lives. Whatever happened to “god gives with both hands”? Maybe we haven’t met enough people. But hell I’d probably bash them over the head with something heavy and metal or marry them. I’m scary like that. Someday we’ll have this convo in person and I will ask you to make up (tragic) stories about beautiful people. That would be an awesome day.
Oooh there’s this really not so great book called “garden spells” can’t remember who by but the main character uses all sorts of flowers in all sorts of foods. It sounds really interesting! When are you going to do it? Take pictures! And do like a little review hehe.
No! Dostoyevsky or Dostoevsky or however you want to spell it is great! But after reading a column, you have to stop and think. And you know when you keep putting a book down because of bloody hw and everything and you lose the chain? Yeahh. Bloody hell. One day I swear I will finish everything by Dostoyevsky and that Anna Karenina book that I got halfway through. What have you been reading recently? Ahaha have you ever watched Quills? Can I lend it to you and make you watch it? Its about the Marquis de Sade. Haha why is the other Vicki number 1? Age?
Nope. Have you used the bath bomb? Well… you mean apart from twilight? Kidding. I haven’t watched the movie so I can’t say it was crap. Yet. I needs me evidence!
I don’t think love is stupid. I think it IS necessary. I just think that idealistic romantic love that’s stuck in everyone’s heads because of asshole books and movies and bull is a waste of time and energy. So we both believe in tabula rasa then? I agree with you but I think that a more educated opinion would be one that you choose to take on after evaluating the lot? I mean otherwise are we just dead fish? 300 POUNDS!!! HOLY FUCK. Did she actually ever get a job after uni? You take Viagra? But I don’t know. Is your pride connected to it somehow?
Only ashamed because I was supposed to be doing homework . Nurture definitely. And that’s why I’m an asshole. But if you believe in nurture but also freedom and responsibility in the Sartre way then… what? What about people who want to be happy but can’t be happy? Suppose there are two ways to judge a life; by its impact on others and by the satisfaction gained by the person living it. But none of that is quantitative. Well if I were a smarter person, I’d move to a slum somewhere so I can appreciate life without the impact of consumerism. I hate money. Can’t live with it and can’t live without it. Bit like being married to an asshole. But perhaps they differ in the quality of life? One will die from obesity-related disease or an accident during lipo while the other will die from malnutrition. Which is more painful?
What about things to do now lists? I like lists. They give me something to do before I decide what I want to do.
Ahaah you on treasurer?! Oooh well trash that idea then. Did I ever tell you about Angelspit? No I never really wanted the world. I just wanted to wear a cape and monocle and an army costume … and yell at people. I need self-empowerment. A change of personality. And personal growth.
And sorry about the late reply . I’m such a bitch. We should use emails once again. These are too long for "comments" >.<
Aww, Shelley darling, that sucks, since analysis is like 95% of the course. I used to hate analyzing the crap out of everything, but now I find it safer. My imagination seems to have dried up. Mmm, but I’m not very vixen-y. I could try it. It’s better than a smiley face. :) Oh, hehe, yes, that’s very you isn’t it? Something cool, but obscure. Nah, I reckon you’ll forget high school altogether. I mean seriously, what do you remember from the past 5 years?
Well…I think that there are other virtues other than beauty and intelligence. Compassion, integrity, and kindness. Oh, well, I have pretty hands, so I guess my face isn’t. I don’t mind. I used to wish I was beautiful, but I don’t mind it so much anymore. Like you said, more important things, and yeah, I’d rather be beautiful on the inside. I get what you mean about Quinn and Daria, it seems you can’t be beautiful and smart. Yeah, there are people that are just empty, and just because they are beautiful, they don’t captivate because there’s nothing inside, and soon you can’t stand the stench of rotting.
Yeah, I think that’s true. I mean, everyone’s life is sorta boring. You are sorta scary. You used to scare me. It’s not that you’re not scary anymore, I just got used to it. Ooh, yes, tragic stories. :) Oh, that sounds like a really cool book, I searched it up with my google-fu. I made pavlova for my picnic tomorrow, I’ll give you some if there’s any left over. :)
Ah, deep thoughts. Sometimes I like those. Anna Karenina was good, I’ve never finished it either. I’ve been reading up on folklore and legends. It really fascinates me! Ooh, yeah, I’ll watch it! Yeah, well, its age (she’s older) plus last name ‘C’ comes before ‘L’.
No, I haven’t used many lush bath bombs. I prefer the bubble slices. Yeah, idealist romance stuck in everyone’s head because of Disney and movies and just the whole idealism. Love isn’t roses and fairytales and happily ever after. It’s about compromise, and I think that these days, everyone seems to not care about anything anymore. The only things we value are power and money, and we worship fame and money and beautiful people. It’s so stupid. The most stupid things ever are: speed dating, facebook, online dating and twitter. And possible other things that I cannot remember. But all these things do is feed narcissism. Tabula rasa always reminds me of that Buffy episode where everyone forgot everything. I think that amnesia would be fun, don’t you? I have no compunctions against being a high class call girl. Is that weird? It's just that I've read Alexa (The Real Princess Diaries) and she makes it sound... fun. She makes like $1000 an hour, which is more than most people make in a WEEK. Oh, and yeah, Belle de Jour's current employer doesn't care that she was a call girl. http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2009/nov/15/belle-de-jour-blogger-prostitute
I’m not really sure what I believe in. I think I mostly believe in nature, since it seems that people’s personalities are from when they’re kids (I mean, if you look at when you were a kid, it’s not like you’ve changed that much. I’m still quiet, introverted, and not a big fan of people). I mean, environment certainly does shape you to a degree, but I dunno. It’s not like people ever really change. I'm not suddenly going to be extroverted and outgoing. I think that happiness is a state of mind, and not a situation. You can choose to be happy. But then again, I think about the people who are born into like third world countries, do you think they're happy? It makes me so angry. I know no one ever said life was fair, but it just seems so unjust that like you said, there are people dying of starvation while others are dying because they can’t stop eating. And erm, I think malnutrition is more painful. And sllooooooooow. When I die, I want it to be fast.
Ugh, yeah, I know exactly how you feel. Money turns you off, but you need it. But erm, why do you need an asshole husband? Please don't say because he's good looking.
I feel like a rat. I guess that’s why they call it the ‘rat race’. We’re working to buy stuff that we don’t really need with money we don’t really have. I’d like to live in a rainforest and be self-sufficient. I think that’s my goal/dream. I don’t want to be stuck in the endless cycle of a nine-to-five job that I hate to make money. And I know that I say I hate materialism and consumerism, but having stuff makes me happy. :/ I feel bad for feeling that way.
Do now lists are good. I mean, lists are good, they help get things done, and make sure that I don’t forget something, but seriously, all those books on ‘Things to do before you die’ are silly. What happens if you don’t finish the list before you die? You’ll feel like you’ve missed out.
What’s Angelspit? I didn’t really want the world either. I just wanted nice dresses. You... have a thing for capes don’t you? Well, I think you’re heading in the right direction. :) I think you have to know your goals before you can achieve them. I was annoyed the other day because I didn't know what I want from life, and how will I know if I get 'it' if I don't even know what 'it' is?
Yeah, but emails get buried under all these other emails. And you/I forget to reply. Or you don’t use your email anymore. But yes, too long for comments. :P And maybe the word limit helps keep me from rambling. Erm, maybe.
NONONNOOO! Vicki we have to start making up wild plans again so that your creative juices come back! Analysis makes me woozy. It takes the fun out of everything. I even analyse ads now T.T Ahahaha I’d laugh every time I see the smiley face though! Its so… mysterious and rebellious. Gross I sound like a chef talking about what I just cooked. Meh but what if I don’t like Dumitrescu in five years? What if someone knows more about him than I do!! That’d suck. Well doesn’t your memory work so that you remember the crap of your recent past and the highlights of your distant past? You know, I regret not being more… active. (not physically)
Is your aunt any of those? That’s not what I meant when I made that comment about hands and faces. I meant to say that maybe the compromise was utter bullshit. Yeah I used to want to be beautiful. Now I just want to look striking or creepy. Its not working. One day I’m going to prove you wrong ^^ I’m going to find someone who’s beautiful and smart! OR you know what? We can work on that! I mean if we haven’t tried then how can we say that it doesn’t work? Suddenly I’m reminded of breakfast at tiffany’s with all this talk of rats and bores.
Ahahah how did I used to scare you??? You were the one planning to stab me in my sleep! (I think I’ve been asked that question about a billion times). You know, your rapport. Not in the way it was supposed to but it broke the ice! Well done. Otherwise I might still be dreaming up different answers to that bloody question. (ooh looksie a pun!) It sounds like but it’s not a really cool book. Don’t waste your time reading it like I did. OOoh did you finish making it then? Aww haha you’re sweet. Have fun on the picnic! Are you actually going anywhere though? What’s ms Leto (sp?) making?
Do you know what happens in the end? I told Sambavi to tell me so she did and now… I regret it. But hopefully I’ll forget so I can go back and read it. Have you ever read Homer’s anything? Yeah I love all the Greek mythology. Ohh you grew out of your horror book phase! I’ve been reading Russian short stories …yummo.
Yeah hopefully I remember to bring Quills sometime ^^ Darn does that mean we can’t have a Vicki-off? Like… to the death?
And hollywood. And even bollywood. I have a toothache. Sorry, random babble. Isn’t love basically the same as a medicine degree? Like people only want it because its highly sought after and it makes everyone else envious. Or maybe we don’t want lovers. We want slaves. Hm.. I’d pay a good stack of money not to be famous. Maybe we should get with the literature buffs. Move in nerd circles and go to book launches or something. At least that way we’d be worshiping intelligence… to some extent. I don’t actually know what speed dating is… I think I read somewhere that facebook was for stalking your friends, twitter was for stalking celebs and bebo was for stalking jailbait. I wish I had short term memory loss. Why are you asking me if that’s weird? As though I’d be in a position fit to judge. It does sound interesting. I’m not sure if what ever little pride I have would make way for it though. It’s probably one of those decisions that we should make later in life when we’ve got more to lose (i.e. more mature).
But family environment is pretty much set for the first 18 years of life so why nature? I mean you know how a child’s first word is often “no” because adults say it to them so often then doesn’t it mean that all other factors impact the kid as well? But if you were moved to a radically different environment then you’d be forced to change who you are. It makes you angry but what are you going to do about it?
Because I would’ve invested a great deal of time and effort into a loving relationship…even though he’s an asshole. Assholes are loveable too!
I went through this stage once where I thought…I wish we didn’t have money. I wish we just bartered stuff. You’ve given me an idea! Brace yourself! Let’s go and camp in the bush/forest/make-believe rainforest in the royal national park sometime! And we can get in touch with nature and meditate and have fun hehe. Oh and try and decide why we haven’t killed ourselves off yet (I mean, what we’re living for)
Angelspit’s a band. But the point is the main singer is amelia tan/ amelia arsenic and she’s crazy gorgeous but the amazing thing is she came out of our school. So there’s some hope yet I suppose. www.destroyx.com
You to your capes and me to my dresses! I mean swap it around! Well when and if we go on that camping trip, we’ll find out what we want from life :D
YAY I broke the 2 page mark. Ahahaha um okay no emails then :’(
Yeah, we should. But I’m so lazy. I guess I’m still sorta creative when I bake things. :) I love baking. I used to hate analyzing, but you know how they go “If you can’t beat them, join them”? Well, I figure there’s no way to escape, so I might as well enjoy it. A smiley face is rebellious? Oh, did you know someone last year managed to put “If You Seek Amy”? (You know, the Britney song? I sang along to that for AGES before I realized) Well, in five years, it won’t matter, since you’ll never wear your jersey after this time next year. Oh, my memory glosses over anything bad that happened and only remembers the good stuff. Oh, but I remember the REALLY REALLY bad stuff. Oh, what do you mean? Like more involved with other people and stuff?
Is my aunt any of what? Oh, yeah, it is. But you are beautiful. It’s funny (or sad) how we never see all the beauty that we possess, but other people can. I guess it’s sad. We spend our whole lives wishing we were like someone else, when they probably spent their lives wishing they were someone else too.
I dunno, you were so cool and remote, and I just felt like you were above me. I used to feel that a lot, that people were above me. I finally realized that we’re all equal, and I guess the things I used to elevate and think were supremely important aren’t really. I got over my inferiority complex. Oh yeah, the whole trying to imitate you. :) The picnic was fun! I felt so naughty, sitting in the front of the school, the forbidden area! Man, my life is SO sad if that’s what makes me feel naughty. Oh, she was busy so she bought croissants from Baker’s Delight.
Oh, I don’t. Don’t spoil it! Does someone die though? Haha, do you thnk you’ll forget? No, but I’ve been meaning to. I love Greek mythology too! And also mythology and folklore and fairies! You know, like the seelie and unseelie court. It’s all so fascinating. And also urban legends! Yeah, sorta. Mmm, I love fairytales. We’re not having a Vicki-off! I like Vicki 1. She’s sweet and smart and sometimes I want to hug her to death. (ooh, I wonder if you caught the The Cure reference)
You should get your tooth checked out. I don’t like having toothache. We don’t want lovers. We want someone to be our everything, we want someone to take care of our every need and make the big bad world better. Well, there’s no-one like that. I mean, I think we elevate people to the status of gods, or put them up on a pedestal, and then break up with them because they’re only human and they make mistakes or they’re not perfect. See, that’s what’s wrong with the way movies and books portray love, they say that it’s always perfect. Well, it’s not. Ooh, book launches. You know, there are some really good looking authors out there. Yeah, basically, myspace, twitter and facebook foster stalking, narcissism, or ADHD in some form. Gosh, people still use bebo? I dunno, because you’re the only one whose opinion I would respect on that subject. I have ideological conflicts with other people to ask them if they think that’s weird. What does pride have to do with it? Is it the social stigma attached to it? For some reason, I wouldn’t be ashamed if I was. Not that I’d go around saying that I’m a call girl, I don’t want to have to deal with people’s crap and misconceptions and naivety, but I wouldn’t be ashamed. It’s a job, and your job doesn’t define who you are. The amount of money or power you have doesn’t define who you are.
Yeah, that’s true, but Dean’s personality was evident since he was just born. I think that if you changed to a different environment, you’d slip on a different mask. It’s like Jaques’ speech in ‘As You Like It’, “All the world’s a stage…” we have our roles, and we do what we have to do to conform and belong, we wear whatever mask we need to, to fit in, but that doesn’t change who we are inside. I have no idea what my point is anymore. I want to do something about it. I think that I’d like to do a lot of philanthropy when I’m old enough. But first I have to help myself before I can help others. Yeah, I guess, he’s an asshole, but he’s your asshole. It’s sorta like… you don’t want him, but you don’t really want anyone else to have him.
Yeah, I used to wish I was completely self-sufficient, but then I did economics and I understand the reason for specialization, because it leads to a higher standard of living, and if I had to grow my own food, I wouldn’t be able to sit around and think about crap. Ooh, you should join us on Victoria’s camp! I’m sure the sitting in sermons would be relaxing! Haha, yes. Because suicide is not an option, remember, existentialists don’t advocate suicide, just because the world is absurd.
Oh cool! Well, I’m sure a lot of successful people have graduated from our school. Ooh, she’s Asian? Hmm, her mouth is open for every single photo, but she’s gorgeous. Haha, you should wear a cape sometime.
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